During that self-indulgent, ego-maniacal speel of yours (What you missed)

The Grinch stole Christmas.

loljokes.

But no. Seriously. All this time you've been wrapped up in your own issues; concentrating all your energy in that little, hollow thing called your head, thinking you need everything you got to make it through:

(a) Has this solved anything? Or has it made you more pedantic, worried and hopeless?
(b) Did you notice the signs before it came? Did you? Did you really notice those bloodshot eyes; the slits on her wrists; that pale, pale white turn yellow and grey and ashen.

Or did you only notice when she killed herself?

Question: did you really love her, as you said you did?

Don't wait until it's too late. She might not be fine, no matter what they all say.